On High Alert For Jabberwock Attacks

Patrick DoubleThreat Magee

If my life was a cartoon, my anxiety would be a jerkass monkey on my back, constantly telling me how terrible I am. I should point out that this monkey has somehow developed the ability to communicate with humans and wears some kind of evil fez and oh no wait I’m totally thinking of Abu from Aladdin.

abu

Let’s start again.

What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Shivers A Lot?

Everybody suffers from anxiety at some point in their life. It’s an evolutionarily-based coping mechanism that allows us to imagine possible future threats, and then act to escape or resolve those threats. In small doses anxiety can be an incredibly efficient problem solver, which is why the world Rubik’s Cube championships are held over a pit of lava.

But when that anxiety never goes away, when it starts interfering with your everyday life? That’s an anxiety disorder, and…

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Tiny Ten

It goes without saying that I watch a lot of films and shows. Probably (definitely) too much if we’re being honest here. In my defence, it’s also my job to ensure that people know when their favourite films and shows are available on little discs and as little buyable files on the interwebs (YOU’RE WELCOME).

And without further kerfuffle, I present my top ten NEW and OLD films viewed in 2013. I’ll post a different film every other day.

Stay tuned for the television version. I should also add that I can’t remember what year it is or what movies I have seen.

Who are you and what am I doing here?

THE NEW ONES

Number 5

Oh Boy

The director of this film came on stage after the screening to answer some questions during the Sydney Film Festival. This is relevant because the director is a babe. The main actor in the film (who happens to not even be an actor, just your every day BFF to the director) is also a babe. I’m vague on names because they’re both relatively unknown Germans and the film was in German. Did I mention it’s an existential comedy in black and white? According to the German Director Man, this is to give it a timeless feel and to show that the plights of a generation are not restricted to our current time.

The film is a bit of a love letter to Berlin and seems to lament the recent gentrification of the city. And if you’ve ever wondered whether or not your only purpose in life is to wander through an entire day just trying to find a place that will serve you coffee, then this is definitely the film for you!  Never have I felt a stronger cathartic connection to the art of coffee consumption!

It deals with existential issues in such a timely and funny way. I chuckled through it and left the cinema feeling a little bit empty and wondering where the hell I could get a coffee. I’m not selling this well. But neither were any of the coffee vendors in the film. The less you know about the film before seeing it, the better.

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